This blog is dedicated to all my ORU friends who’ve taken this mandatory course ;-)

Tonight my heart is very overwhelmed to be honest. There are things that I will just never understand. Questions that are reeling through my mind. Reflections in my personal life, my new married life, living 12,000 miles away from home and a mindful of other things. Then I’m also thinking about a young man’s life who is being celebrated at ORU today and while I’m encouraged by his life for Jesus, I’m sad that he suffered with cancer and left this world so young.

Cancer and death confuse me anyway. I’ve lost 3 family members to cancer and countless others on top of my best friend and cousin dying of cancer when she and I were 14 after a 7 year battle. In the time of pain and suffering however, I really encountered The Lord. Not a man preaching. Not a religion. Not a good idea. Not a well thought out strategy to win friends and influence people. I met Jesus Christ and He became so alive and real to me. This didn’t mean over night that I became perfect or like Him, nor does it mean 12 years later that I’m the best example of one living for Him or have it figured out. It does mean that He is real to me and I know without a shadow of doubt that He is alive and full of love for me.

What about my questions though? Why do some get healed and others don’t? Why is life crazy hard sometimes and knocks you off your feet? Why do bad things happen even when you’ve been faithful? I don’t know. But I do know that I can’t focus on the spinning wheels of “whys” all the time. I have to focus on what I do know.

What I do know is that He is with me right NOW. I am not alone. God gave us the precious gift of His Holy Spirit so that I could dwell with God. While my precious little mind can not remotely comprehend that, my spirit can receive Him in fullness. I’m thankful that there is a supernatural strength to my weakness. An empowerment stronger than my mixed emotions. A love that exceeds what I could ever give.

Holy Spirit is in the NOW. He was in our yesterday and He will be in our tomorrow too. We have to embrace Him in the now and receive what lies before us today! He has the wisdom from God, the love of Christ, the beauty of redemption to reveal to us now. He can walk us through valleys of tears and laughter of mountain tops. He can meet our hunger spiritually and satisfy.

As I reflect on this young ORU graduate today, I see his smile. I hear his loud life lived well before the Father. I know he embraced the now. He held onto Holy Spirit, loved well in a strength not his own and he is now dancing in glory!

May I be motivated as he. May my life be lived in the NOW. May I see the waiter and be moved with compassion. May I seize the moments to just be enthralled with God’s heart. To be filled with Him so that others may know the way of life, love and redemption. I want to be filled with what He’s speaking and sharing now…not satisfied on yesterday’s fulfillment or hoping for a far off day.

All I can say is,”Holy Spirit come….” Come refresh. Come turn my questions into seeking You. Come heal. Come restore. Come move me aside and reveal Jesu.

Oh and one other thing to do NOW is sleep ;-)

Bonne Nuit (French is coming along slowly but surely ;-) )

When someone is talking to me, I often look at them intently. When I am processing something out loud or in deep thought as I speak, I look around and I notice EVERYTHING. The chipped paint, the crooked picture, the moving clouds, the fly buzzing back and forth. My eyes dart because I assume my brain is connecting neural pathways to formulate my thoughts. LOL…or something like that!

Today as I was talking to Stephen in our living room, my eyes were bouncing on the tall trees across the street from us. Suddenly one thin, yet very tall tree began to fall backwards. I exclaimed, “Woah…” Rather silently and in a drawn out fashion as Stephen turned his head to where my eyes were fixed. “What?!”, he asked. ::CRASH:: I heard the tree fall. I began to tell him that a tree had just fallen and asked if he had heard it. He did not hear it because he didn’t know that it was falling. His brain wasn’t seeking to listen to for a tree falling, it was listening to me talking.

The funny and philosophical question has been around and even altered for ages that states, “If a tree fell in a forest and no one was around to hear it, does it make a sound?”. Of course there are MANY ways to look at this question. What is sound? Was there a woman around? Haha! What about animals?

When I thought about what happened today and putting into context with living in Madagascar, I wanted to write about this. You see, I was looking intently at the tree before it fell. My eyes were fixed on it as it fell and I then was listening to hear it make a sound. Stephen however didn’t see it falling and therefore didn’t hear the sound at all. I wonder how many times we’re not seeing things, therefore we don’t know that they are a problem. I wonder how often there are things on God’s heart that we’re have blind eye or a deaf ear towards. Clearly Stephen wasn’t in the wrong for listening to me and not watching trees haha, but it was such an interesting thought to me when this occurred.

There are many intense issues facing Madagascar. One happens to involve trees and the fact that this is one of the last remaining tropical rainforest biomes in the world and it is vanishing quickly. Stephen saw some of the larger species of lemurs this weekend in the rain forest named Indri. They are about 2 &1/2’ to 3’ lemurs! Honestly, they sort of creep me out. What’s even crazier is that there used to be lemurs up to 6’ tall!! Um hello to peeing your pants on a hike in the rainforest when that guy jumps across your path! ((Just being honest)) While I may not have wanted to encounter such a large jumping creature, it makes me sad that their homes were destroyed and that they are no more. Madagascar has often been called, “the bleeding island”, because from satellites the red top soil from the forest is being washed into the ocean as if it were bleeding. There is a man here who is a “tree missionary” and is replanting species of trees and working to save the environment here in this beautiful place.

While these things are super important and need to be taken care of, there are some major issues effecting people. The poverty these people face, the diseases they encounter, the lack of education. The horrible human trafficking issues. The equally disturbing organ trafficking issues (yes where people are killed for their organs and they’re shipped off to the orient for medicinal and sacrifice purposes!). Those issues are very very real and they are going on every day here. While we can’t change every single problem and it’s easy to be overwhelmed by any one of these things, if we partner with God’s heart we can at least be looking for the falling trees. The ones who are the people we can pray for to receive healing. The ones who we can feed and clothe. The new generation of people who can become more educated and can grow in the knowledge of God’s word. The women who can know a life of freedom from prostitution and trafficking. Even the lemurs who can have new homes because someone was raised up to care and protect their habitats.

Even if philiosophically the tree falling alone doesn’t make a sound, God sees it fall. AND God sees every person who no one else sees. He sees you. He sees your neighbor. He sees your co-worker. He sees the woman lost in selling her body. He sees the man lost in cheating on his spouse. He sees the teenager cutting their body. AND He cares. AND He sends you and I with His heart to share His love.

Be watching and be listening. You’re planted in His kingdom to be on the look out for falling trees ;-)

When we first moved into our house, we had a few fuses go out and various things. We still don’t have a couple of lights working in our house, but we’ve given up for now. This is mainly because we paid an electrician and well he never came back with the fuse! Ha!

Literally…tonight it didn’t just rain, it poured. Almost every building including our house has tin roofs so as it rains you definitely hear it. Normally it’s kind of fun if we’re at our house and hear the loud ruckus.

Tonight however, we were asked to come speak to a Malagasy youth group for their French service. It’s supposed to be the rainy season here and it’s been fairly dry. The past few days have been season high temps and we’ve been praying for rain! I’m reminded of my prayers in times of drought in Oklahoma, although Madagascar’s 90 degrees isn’t an Tulsa 116! ;-) As we drove to the service, we could see that the clouds were certainly building. The sky was black and the rain drops began to come down. Stephen remarked,”looks like the heavens might open on us…hopefully spiritually, but literally too!”

In we went and the torrential downpour began! We could tell the young people were hungry, so Stephen preached on through 5 power outages ;-) A very sweet Bible School girl came and sat next to me and helped translate some for me. Stephen asked me to share at the end because he had flown through his points to get done before power went out again. I talked for a brief minute and power went out again. I proceeded to use an iPhone flashlight so that the youth pastor could be seen by all as he closed service.

Then we sat in traffic in flooded streets. Can’t really describe a jam where no one moves for 45 minutes, cars are stalled because of flooded engines and of course sweet kids who live on the street are begging at your car windows! Oh how I wish I had a snack in my car to give to them :-(( and oh how quick I am to complain about traffic in Tulsa…although Dallas gave me some equal fights!

When we got home, our fridge went out because of power, so we’re praying our food doesn’t spoil before we can get a fuse tomorrow :-)

Also, in all efforts to save geckos like the one from my post a few days ago, one managed to die in my house today…well sort of inside. Our back door is sliding glass and it has a hand cranked metal door that slides down at night. We saw this gecko last night on the inside of the door and figured he was smart for finding a good place to grab food. Wrong! I tried ALL day to get him to move and he didn’t budge an inch! I couldn’t open the window and tonight I noticed he is a nasty brown color and still hasn’t moved. I also saw he has a major dent in his body like he was smashed by something. So a gecko died on my watch…so goes the circle of life here in Africa ;)

I also killed a spider with my husband’s shoe, but that warrants a smiley face instead ;-)

I’m thankful for a safe dry place to call home tonight, even if we had a long commute home, end up with spoiled food tomorrow and have some dead things on our hands.

BTW—correction on my post from yesterday—the were radiated tortoises from the desert, not sea turtles!

Madagascar is a very beautiful country. It is home to some of the most stunning plants, flowers and species in the world. My dad’s dad apparently said it was the most beautiful place on earth when he traveled here for the Air Force. There are many gemstones found here that are hard to find in other parts of the world. The rubies in my wedding band are from here actually :-) That being said, the airport security is very strict about smuggling animals, plants, gemstones and the like out of country.

Among the rare things found here are extremely endangered sea turtles

It’s funny how culture varies around the world. Even within the same country or world status, there are many subcultures. I saw a picture today on Facebook of a friend who works with bible school young adults in Oklahoma. These students were doing some funny things oblivious to how awkward it could have appeared to others!

Being in Madagascar definitely presents it’s daily culture clashes.
Yesterday we had our first “team church”. This is where one Sunday a month our Assemblies of God missionaries in Madagascar get together to worship, have someone share from the Bible and then review mission field agenda. Yesterday, we also worked on some exercises from a book on cross cultural differences as a team. It was a lot of fun and we joked that Stephen and I should’ve gone through the book for premarital counseling since he is African at heart ;)

Here are a few interesting cultural encounters and updates;

1. I am spending at least 2 hours a day studying French. I’ve learned more in three weeks that I knew before, but I’m still VERY hesitant to speak it. Almost every time I try, I get nervous, my brain freezes and if I do speak, it’s almost always in SPANISH! I didn’t realize how much Spanish I knew until trying to learn French! Ah! I answer “si” often and think in Spanish in my head most days. It’s more awkward than just speaking English as practically no one outside Stephen speaks it. I am thankful for my ability to understand and interact in espanol, however I wish my parents had let me take French when I wanted to growing up.

2. Speaking of French…since we don’t have internet at our house right now, I’ve found myself pacing outside my neighbors’ home to update my French app. Today as I was reviewing past lessons, it was quicker to stay outside and review than going in and out of my house every 3 minutes, although I did that also.This is fine and dandy unless someone is walking by. Of course I’m reviewing animals as the factory by my house let’s out for the day…! The French phrases for “I am a butterfly” and “The wolf is pretty” are coming out of my red headed oober white skin body! Yes heads were turned and I kept speaking…and then retreated inside. Neighbors and bypasses think I’m loca en la cabasa! (Pardon my Spanish, see what I mean? ;) )

3. Speaking of languages, I interacted with some little Malagasy kids today who attend an English school. The youngest ones would shy away from speaking any English. Whereas the older children gladly greeted you in their rehearsed, “Good Morning!” “I am fine, thank you, and you?” :-) It melts my heart EVERY TIME I get to speak to kids in another culture! Their joy to cross language barriers with you is precious.

4. Lastly, today my husband and I had a meeting to greet the Malagasy leadership of the Assemblies of God churches here. Everything went great there and then because we were already across town, we wanted to go a particular place to get some chocolate. Stephen offered to drop me off at the door as he often does anytime he drives somewhere. I normally decline, but took him up on this offer. I jumped out of the nearly moving car and walked into this bakery. Intimidated with my French and aware that I didn’t have enough money on me to purchase anything, I sat down and told the staff my husband was coming (in Frenglish—-French and English mix ;). I’m waiting for a few minutes so I pull out Stephen’s iPhone and open his bible app. I’m reading John chapter 4 in French when I get a phone call from Steve (iPhone isn’t activated yet so he has another phone). “Hey babe!”, I said. “Hey, so a cop pulled me over and took all of my papers and wants a bribe!” Ok, NOT what I was expecting, but this explained why he hadn’t come yet. He asked me to pray and I said I would. Two more bakery employees asked if they could help me and I finally muttered my rehearsed, “je vou drais café au lait avec sucre s’il vous plaît”. Then I asked if that would be possible as I wanted this coffee to be worth my time (refer to my coffee nerd blog). I saw down to the BEST coffee I’ve had eating out in Madagascar! I’d nearly forgotten about my sweet husband, (just kidding) when he came back in. Apparently he knew he shouldn’t cross a certain way in traffic but was following others as they broke traffic laws. For a country that doesn’t have many traffic laws, it seemed fair and no repercussions for anyone else. He had to pull his “I’m a pastor and a white guy who just moved here and didn’t know” card to avoid a ticket, crazy bribe or worse. We’re thankful that the cop had pity on us “white people” and extended grace!

In unrelated news—last night we had dinner with a really great family from Holland. I noticed that the husband and wife wore their wedding rings on their right hands. It reminded me of the night I met Stephen and while he was preaching I sat on his left side. Once I noticed this missionary man didn’t have a ring on his left hand, I wondered if he was married but just wore a ring on his right because he was from a different culture. Lol! Thankfully he wasn’t married :-)

From my world to yours, bonne nuit! Goodnight!

Culture Clashes

It’s funny how culture varies around the world. Even within the same country or world status, there are many subcultures. I saw a picture today on Facebook of a friend who works with bible school young adults in Oklahoma. These students were doing some funny things oblivious to how awkward it could have appeared to others!

Being in Madagascar definitely presents it’s daily culture clashes.
Yesterday we had our first “team church”. This is where one Sunday a month our Assemblies of God missionaries in Madagascar get together to worship, have someone share from the Bible and then review mission field agenda. Yesterday, we also worked on some exercises from a book on cross cultural differences as a team. It was a lot of fun and we joked that Stephen and I should’ve gone through the book for premarital counseling since he is African at heart ;)

Here are a few interesting cultural encounters and updates;

1. I am spending at least 2 hours a day studying French. I’ve learned more in three weeks that I knew before, but I’m still VERY hesitant to speak it. Almost every time I try, I get nervous, my brain freezes and if I do speak, it’s almost always in SPANISH! I didn’t realize how much Spanish I knew until trying to learn French! Ah! I answer “si” often and think in Spanish in my head most days. It’s more awkward than just speaking English as practically no one outside Stephen speaks it. I am thankful for my ability to understand and interact in espanol, however I wish my parents had let me take French when I wanted to growing up.

2. Speaking of French…since we don’t have internet at our house right now, I’ve found myself pacing outside my neighbors’ home to update my French app. Today as I was reviewing past lessons, it was quicker to stay outside and review than going in and out of my house every 3 minutes, although I did that also.This is fine and dandy unless someone is walking by. Of course I’m reviewing animals as the factory by my house let’s out for the day…! The French phrases for “I am a butterfly” and “The wolf is pretty” are coming out of my red headed oober white skin body! Yes heads were turned and I kept speaking…and then retreated inside. Neighbors and bypasses think I’m loca en la cabasa! (Pardon my Spanish, see what I mean? ;) )

3. Speaking of languages, I interacted with some little Malagasy kids today who attend an English school. The youngest ones would shy away from speaking any English. Whereas the older children gladly greeted you in their rehearsed, “Good Morning!” “I am fine, thank you, and you?” :-) It melts my heart EVERY TIME I get to speak to kids in another culture! Their joy to cross language barriers with you is precious.

4. Lastly, today my husband and I had a meeting to greet the Malagasy leadership of the Assemblies of God churches here. Everything went great there and then because we were already across town, we wanted to go a particular place to get some chocolate. Stephen offered to drop me off at the door as he often does anytime he drives somewhere. I normally decline, but took him up on this offer. I jumped out of the nearly moving car and walked into this bakery. Intimidated with my French and aware that I didn’t have enough money on me to purchase anything, I sat down and told the staff my husband was coming (in Frenglish—-French and English mix ;). I’m waiting for a few minutes so I pull out Stephen’s iPhone and open his bible app. I’m reading John chapter 4 in French when I get a phone call from Steve (iPhone isn’t activated yet so he has another phone). “Hey babe!”, I said. “Hey, so a cop pulled me over and took all of my papers and wants a bribe!” Ok, NOT what I was expecting, but this explained why he hadn’t come yet. He asked me to pray and I said I would. Two more bakery employees asked if they could help me and I finally muttered my rehearsed, “je vou drais café au lait avec sucre s’il vous plaît”. Then I asked if that would be possible as I wanted this coffee to be worth my time (refer to my coffee nerd blog). I saw down to the BEST coffee I’ve had eating out in Madagascar! I’d nearly forgotten about my sweet husband, (just kidding) when he came back in. Apparently he knew he shouldn’t cross a certain way in traffic but was following others as they broke traffic laws. For a country that doesn’t have many traffic laws, it seemed fair and no repercussions for anyone else. He had to pull his “I’m a pastor and a white guy who just moved here and didn’t know” card to avoid a ticket, crazy bribe or worse. We’re thankful that the cop had pity on us “white people” and extended grace!

In unrelated news—last night we had dinner with a really great family from Holland. I noticed that the husband and wife wore their wedding rings on their right hands. It reminded me of the night I met Stephen and while he was preaching I sat on his left side. Once I noticed this missionary man didn’t have a ring on his left hand, I wondered if he was married but just wore a ring on his right because he was from a different culture. Lol! Thankfully he wasn’t married :-)

Oh! It’s St. Patrick’s day!!! Happy Irish day to everyone! I didn’t even wear green

My husband told me not so long ago that I was nerdy. Appalled even though he meant it as endearing, I asked him to clarify what made me nerdy. His first response was my knowledge of coffee. Whereas I would just call myself a coffee snob, clearly my interests in a fine cup of joe can be nerdy to some!

So my beloved Keurig is in storage in the States probably eager for my inlaws to use him :-) I packed my Italian stovetop coffee pot (seriously the best thing ever) and my strong plastic French Press to be send over in a shipment. In other words they are sailing on the ocean blue somewhere en route, but unable to satisfy my coffee needs.

I’ve made it a priority how to communicate how I’d like my coffee in Swahilli and now French. However, it’s so hard to communicate in so little words what your beloved coffee (I promise it’s not an idol in my life) should be prepared in a few words. I’ve had more nasty watered down yucky coffee overseas than in America. It’s disappointing because some of the best coffee in the world is grown in places I’ve traveled!! I’m like the problem is not your beans, the problem is you not knowing how to make coffee

Maybe you saw my picture of Facebook of the gecko who would hide from Stephen. Well he used to and then his strength failed him. Or something like that. We noticed that he was hanging out in the corner of our living room by a screen that we use in our window when we open it. It was as if he thought we couldn’t see him, but he could see us. He didn’t move for about 6 days and one day when I scared him by accident I noticed how thin he had become. Honestly this was disheartening because we were killing plenty of mosquitoes so he had no reason to be starving. I mentioned his frail state to Stephen. When the gecko went missing for a couple of days, I was creeped out to think that he would crawl into a corner and died and of find him there

I made it through the day today without intruding on anyone, so that was an improvement from yesterday! Today was about as eventful as a Monday can be. I finally had a decent night of sleep last night! Hall-e-leujah (said in my BEST oklahoma accent)!

We found out that after running around for several days getting paperwork in line for my visa, that now Stephen must reapply for another few years. This means easily another week of running around to governmental offices, avoiding paying bribes, making sure we write in BLUE pens only, and waiting for approval. We’re super thankful another missionary has helped us through this process and that MAF (missions aviation fellowship) is handling our final application stage.

While driving 2 hours round trip for groceries today, I got to stop in a really nice coffee and tea place. Apparently there is nothing like it in Madagascar. There aren’t exactly Starbucks’ on every corner here. Or ANY corner for that matter. I got some freshly ground Arabica Madagascar coffee that smells HEAVENLY for about $2! That’s how much a SHORT black coffee at Starbucks is my friend :) I also found what I’m hoping is REAL cream today. The country mainly has imported UHT milk and this coffee snob doesn’t like it in her coffee. That AND my body is not a fan of it. SO that being said, I’m hoping that a few good cups of coffee are in my future.

When we were in the grocery store, the SAME song was on repeat the entire time. It finally got on both of our nerves. That and our cart that didn’t push well and reading and decoding all the labels on products! At least I’m learning food vocabulary words ;-) As we were checking out, the manager accused us of stealing water. We’d traveled with our own bottles (1.5 Liters) and Stephen had left his in the cart that we were planning on pushing out to the parking lot. I of course explained in English and got weird stares from her and the cashier. I wanted to be like—look at my PAID groceries with a 6pack of water all packaged. If I wanted to steal water, I wouldn’t be spending money on more water. So here we are—your criminal missionaries! Paid for water and all;)

On our drive home tonight, we witnessed something really bizarre. While being directly behind a diplomatic vehicle in bumper bumper traffic, a prostitute approached the car and tried opening both of his doors! Stephen and I were like…?!!! WOAH! What?! This is why you keep your doors locked my friends ;) It’s not as easy as it sounds because we don’t have automatic locks so you have to check them all the time. I’ve seen beggars and street vendors, but nothing as bold as that!

I’m sure my Monday was as eventful as your is/will be! :) Hamanakara as they say in Malagasy or “see you soon”!